Richard Successful
Richard Successful (born Melvin Sprangle, 1952) is the creator of a number of long-running reality television programs including Fix My Face, Face Your Fears, and the entire line-up on Family Fight Fridays.
His latest production, Werewolf Mansion, puts fifteen werewolves in a house full of cameras.
Successful is also well known for numerous cosmetic procedures; most notably his teeth enlargement surgery.
Early career
After leaving high school, Successful found a janitorial job at a television network. Noticing that the quality of reality TV was gradually declining, and believing he could speed up the process, Successful came up with his own program. He gave executives an elevator pitch and they immediately greenlit the idea. (He also redefined the term ‘elevator pitch’ to mean ‘threaten to pitch someone down an elevator shaft’.)
‘I’m Too Dumb to Die!’
Successful’s first show, I’m Too Dumb to Die! put contestants of below-average intelligence in a survival situation with a film crew documenting their plight. However, as the network did not want to risk a lot of money on the new venture, changes were made to the conceived formula, and a local beach was used as the ‘desert’. The network also cut the I.Q-based audition process, instead using winners from their other reality shows, claiming it was an ‘equivalent method of testing’. Their theory was proven on day one, when contestants failed to notice the nearby lifeguard towers, food vendors, or ocean.
At the end of each installment of ITDTD, each participant was asked to vote off another by secret ballot. However, none of the contestants knew how to use a pen. (Consequently, the same contestants were used for all four seasons.) During Season Three, one contestant did manage to scrawl an X, but then forgot and thought it was a treasure map. This ‘map’ then became the focus of Episode #3.04 (“I’m Digging for Gold!”) and #3.05 (“I’m Stuck Down a Hole!”).
I’m too Dumb to Die! was a runaway success, maintaining high ratings until its cancellation (the network bowed to viewer complaints after contestants ate an ice cream man). By then Successful had begun work on other shows for the network, which also became hits.
Literary Career
Successful has also penned several self-help books including Overdress for Oversuccess!; The Sky’s No Limit: Be a Successtronaut!; and Successasaurus Rex: How to Live Large and Leave a Colossal Fossil!
Many critics cite the books as evidence that Successful has ‘lost touch with regular people’. Most often quoted is ‘Savour Every Success… the Next One Will Be Harder to Find!’ in which the author compares life’s small victories to endangered animals he’s eaten.
Private Life
Successful’s spending is almost as famous as his wealth. Among the list of Successful’s more extravagant purchases are a woolly mammoth skeleton, a World War II tank, and Greenland.
Successful has also been married and divorced eleven times. His current wife is T.V. actress Susan Finale.
